Friday, 31 July 2009

Farmer Arrested For Being Tooled Up

Do you remember the case of Tony Martin, the Norfolk farmer who shot a teenaged intruder dead back in 1999?

Tony was freed from jail in 2003 after serving two thirds of a five-year sentence for the manslaughter of 16 year old Fred Barras.

Mr Martin shot Barras and his fellow burglar 33 year old Brendan Fearon after confronting them when they broke into his home at Emneth Hungate, Norfolk, in August 1999.

Now it is reported that he has been arrested and questioned by police in Cambridgeshire for allegedly possessing an offensive weapon.

Mr Martin, 64, was arrested when police stopped his car and found what was believed to be, wait for it, a farm sickle!

The police are taking no further action but they did give him a fixed penalty notice for not wearing a seatbelt following the incident.

Doesn’t it make you feel that bit safer knowing that the police cells are filled with electricians brandishing screwdrivers and plumbers wielding heavy wrenches?

Oh, how I love sarcasm!

Thursday, 30 July 2009

'Tis Still The Summer Of Our Discontent

As a perfect follow on from yesterday’s blog, in today’s news there is a story highlighting the rapidly declining quality of this summer’s weather.

Organisers of the popular one-day Brecon County Show in mid-Wales have been forced to cancel it for the first time in 254 years because of the weather.

This agricultural show which has an attendance of 10,000 people each year, was due to be staged on Saturday.

The committee held a crisis meeting yesterday after hearing the weather forecast, and unfortunately, after so much rain and with the promise of more to come, including on show day itself, they had no alternative but to cancel the show.

The show society's secretary, Barbara Green said it would lose up to £30,000.

"The marquees are all up, we've taken over 1,000 entries for livestock, dogs, sheep… everything was in place and ready to go," she said.

"We are very, very disappointed and it was a very hard decision to make as we have been planning it for the last year or so. But everyone's been very understanding and we aim to be back next year."

"This is the first time in the show's 254 year history that it's been cancelled because of the weather," Ms Green added. "It was called off once before in 2001 because of the foot-and-mouth disease restrictions. But the show went ahead fine the following year so we hope that will be the case this time."

Do you believe me now? The weather IS going mad!

Consider, this agricultural show has been going since 1755, held in one of the wettest parts of the UK, it has jogged along quite nicely, thank you, in those heady pre-global warming days. Then all of a sudden, Kaboom! This field is waterlogged on the first Saturday in August for the first time in over a quarter of a millennium.

This alleged global warming’s not going to be any good if it can’t even dry out a soggy field so that a few thousand folk can have a day out at a much anticipated show, is it?

Wednesday, 29 July 2009

Now 'Tis The Summer Of Our Discontent

Cast your mind back if you will to last April, the very last day to be precise.
Do you recall a prediction for this summer, from the Met Office, with headlines saying something like, ‘Britain’s in for a barbeque summer’?

The Met Office promised that temperatures were likely to be warmer than average across the UK, topping 30C at times and that rainfall should be "near or below average" for the three months of summer.

Chief meteorologist at the Met Office, Ewan McCallum, said "After two disappointingly wet summers the signs are much more promising this year.
We can expect times when temperatures will be above 30C, something we hardly saw at all last year."

Well folks, in case you hadn’t guessed, they have reneged on the deal!

The Met Office is now issuing a revised forecast for more unsettled weather for the rest of the summer.

This is the third summer in a row where the weather in the UK has been damp and coolish, what’s happened to global warming?

The very phrase ‘global warming’ throws a large percentage of the world’s population into a panic, so why not come clean and stop the scare-mongering. Let’s call it by it’s proper name, ‘regional warming’ and get on with our lives.

One thing’s for sure. The heat from south Essex this summer hasn’t contributed to the melting of the ice cap!

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

The Twits At Whitehall Strike Again

There’s no wonder why journalists call this time of the year ‘silly season’, the period in summer when there are no decent news stories worth getting your teeth into.

I’ve been becalmed in an ocean of no-news for a couple of days now, so in sheer desperation I offer you this story!

Hands up all of you that are ‘tweeters‘, that is, do you have an account with the micro-blog site ‘Twitter’?

It appears that anybody who is anyone in HM Government is a ‘tweeter’, so much so that the government has seen fit to compile and distribute a twenty page, 5,382 word strategy paper for its departments on how to use ‘Twitter’.

When ‘Twitter’ subscribers want to make entries into their little tiny blogs they find themselves limited to 140 characters per message. If you are a member of the government you will have at hand this document showing you how the enter these 140 characters in no less than 36,215 characters of instruction!

If, instead of issuing this as a document, the government decided to distribute it using good old ‘Twitter’, it would take getting on for 260 separate ‘Tweets’.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure that ‘Twitter’ has its uses but why, oh why do they have to create a manual, when the actual meat of the document could be distributed in a two page email.

So there you have it, you now know what the twits are spending your money on!

Friday, 24 July 2009

Swine Flu? Why Not Call A Welder

The Government's National Flu Service website, which is designed to give suspected swine flu sufferers access to anti-viral drugs without pestering their doctor, crashed immediately after being launched yesterday afternoon.

Due to the sheer volume of hits, the site was down for more than two hours. Visitors to the site were greeted with a message which read, "The service is currently very busy and cannot deal with your request at this time. Please try again in a little while."

How authentic is that? Just like phoning a real GP’s surgery on a normal day!

The trouble is, this call centre/chat room is not a real doctors surgery and the person you are consulting is not a real doctor.

If you contact this hot line you are more than likely to be diagnosed by an out of work welder than someone with a medical background. The staff have had only six hours training to do this job.

There are thousands of doctors that have graduated in the past few years that haven’t found a placement, why not draft these in to man the phones and keyboards?

There has already been at least one case of misdiagnosis, where a young woman’s GP, yes GP, not welder, diagnosed swine flu when in fact she was actually suffering from meningitis!

When you add the potential deaths from wrongly diagnosed swine flu to the fatalities in the Afghan War, Gordon Brown suddenly dons the cloak of the Grim Reaper!

Thursday, 23 July 2009

OK. You Can Get Rid Of That Shotgun Now, Pa

How the world has changed! The Church of England is now adopting a buy one, get one free attitude.

Unmarried couples with children will now be able to baptise their children and get married in the same occasion.

Under new guidelines issued by the Church of England, the two sacraments will be allowed to be combined in one service.

Twenty percent of couples taking part in the marriage ceremony already have children and they hope that by combining the two sacraments, the Church will be meeting the needs of real families who might have been discouraged from having a church wedding.

This sounds like the religious equivalent to vote catching to me!

A spokesman denied that the changes meant the Church was contradicting itself on its own teaching that sex should only take place within marriage.

He said that traditional teaching still pointed to celibacy outside of marriage, and that children are best served by being raised by married parents.

Coming from an age when people stopped short of stoning unmarried mothers to death, this seems rather strange to me.

This comes just a few short years after there were news reports that some vicars were refusing to baptise children if they were born outside of wedlock.

If the Church continues to move the goalposts, is there any wonder why attendances are dwindling?

Predictions of Britain becoming a Muslim country by 2050 are now starting to look like a reality!

Wednesday, 22 July 2009

A Hero's Farewell

A public funeral with military honours will be held for Henry Allingham who died last Saturday aged 113. The funeral will take place at St Nicholas Church in Brighton on 30th July.

Henry, who was born in Clapton, east London in 1896 was the world’s oldest man before he died. He was one of the last surviving servicemen of World War I, the last survivor of the Battle of Jutland and a founder member of the RAF. His life spanned three centuries and six monarchs.

I trust that Sky News will give Mr Allingham’s funeral the same quarter-of-a-day’s coverage accorded to the final farewell of Jade Goody and Michael Jackson!

Why do I come out with these silly statements!

Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Bristol Car Theft Murder

In Bristol Crown Court yesterday, jurors heard the case of an elderly man from Bristol who died when he was repeatedly run over with his car when he tried to stop a thief from stealing it.

Walter Bollen, 76, appears to have left the keys in his car when he got out to open a gate at his home in Green Close, Horfield.

He was run over when he got into a fight with Scott Couch, 23, who was trying to take the car.

Couch had admitted taking and driving the car but denied murder.

The court heard that Couch had been drinking and was looking for a way to return to his home at Severn beach, about six miles away when he came across Mr Bollen and his unlocked Skoda.

Couch jumped into the driver's seat and Mr Bollen went back to the car to try to drag him out.

The pair struggled and witnesses said Mr Bollen was thrown to the ground, possibly after being hit by the vehicle.
Couch is then alleged to have reversed the vehicle and ran over Mr Bollen twice as he lay on the ground.

Couch then sped off before abandoning the car in a neighbouring street with a flat tyre and damage caused in the incident, the court heard.

Mr Bollen was pronounced dead at the scene.
A post-mortem examination showed that he had suffered crushing injuries to his chest and internal organs and had a fractured skull.

The trial will continue today.

Assuming that Scott Couch is found guilty, I wonder how many hours community service he will receive for this!

Monday, 20 July 2009

Demonstration On How An Ex-Minister Can Turn On A Sixpence.

David Cameron, Leader of the Opposition says that the failure to supply more helicopters to British troops in Afghanistan is "a scandal".

Gordon Brown, Prime Minister says that army chiefs in Afghanistan were satisfied they had the equipment to do the job asked of them and the army was better equipped than ever.

The government insists that the military has never been so well resourced as it is at present.

Chief of Defence Staff, Sir Jock Stirrup says that the deployment of more helicopters to Afghanistan would save soldiers' lives.

John Hutton, who retired as Secretary of State for Defence last month says that the mood among UK troops in Afghanistan is "unequivocal" on the need for more manpower and resources. He also says that ministers have a "fundamental responsibility" to grant military equipment requests.

Whoa! Hutton WAS the minister up to the start of last month. So how come he didn’t acknowledge this fundamental responsibility when he was the top banana?

When a renegade minister starts criticising the Government, phrases like ‘vote catching’ and ‘populist statements’ come to mind!

Saturday, 18 July 2009

New Labour Is Old Hat

In an interview in today’s Daily Telegraph, former Work and Pensions Secretary James Purnell, who quit the cabinet during the local and European elections last month, has said he lost faith in Gordon Brown as leader six months ago.

This has prompted the ‘never say die’, government faithful to pop their heads above the parapet.

Home Secretary Alan Johnson, also in the Telegraph, said that Mr Brown is the "best man for the job".

Ex-Defence Secretary John Hutton, this time speaking on the BBC's Straight Talk programme, said Mr Brown had "many, many talents" and it was a "tragedy" voters did not see them.

OK John, tell Gordon to show us these talents and we’ll have a look at them!

Meanwhile, back to Mr Purnell who stated "It's a very different feeling being twelve years into government from the idealism of the start, but we need to recapture that idealism, not by living in the past or by aping New Labour or just sticking to the old tunes.
We need to open up New Labour, reinvent it and then eventually move beyond it."

Try running that one past the traditional flat cap toting, whippet owning voter who, back in 1997 thought that he was voting for the good old red flag waving Labour Party. See what they think about your New Labour now!

Friday, 17 July 2009

Better Late Than Never

From today’s BBC website news pages:

Police e-fit specialists have drawn up the first "realistic" picture of infamous highway man Dick Turpin, 270 years after he was sent to the gallows.

With no surviving drawings or paintings of Turpin, police produced the image using the descriptions issued by the London Gazette newspaper in 1735 and 1737 after the government offered a reward for his capture.

I know the British police are a bit slow of the mark, but this one takes the biscuit!

You can read the full story at Police release Dick Turpin e-fit

Thursday, 16 July 2009


Owing to commitments, there will be no blog today.

Wednesday, 15 July 2009

The Battle Of Culloden 2009

A story today that is tucked away inside the newspapers, but first a history lesson.

The Battle of Culloden on Culloden Moor near Inverness, Scotland on 16th April 1746, where hundreds of men of Charles Edward Stuart’s Jacobite army were massacred by the Hanoverian army of William Augustus, Duke of Cumberland. The last battle on British soil, a battle that altered the course of Scottish history. One of those battles where the dead were buried where they fell.

Now, 260 years later, signs are to be erected at the site asking visitors to respect the site as a war grave following a complaint about picnickers.

A member of ‘A Circle of Gentlemen’, a society which recalls the Jacobite cause, said he was furious at the behaviour of some tourists.
Alasdair MacNeill said he saw a family picnicking on top of one of the grave mounds.

Mr MacNeill said he and other members had complained to the National Trust for Scotland.
He said, "A family of four and their two dogs were sprawled across a grave mound having a picnic. The father was leaning against the headstone eating a Scotch egg and smoking a cigarette."

The circle member said he would not expect such behaviour to be acceptable at World War I battlefields such as Flanders or Ypres.
Mr MacNeill said Culloden's fallen were hastily buried in wide, but shallow graves, by British soldiers.
He added, "Many people, especially American tourists, come to Culloden because it is a revered place and to find their relatives."

Mr MacNeill is absolutely correct. This must be a terrible affront to the Scottish nation. I know little about Scottish history but this must be the most important and revered site in the whole of Scotland.

I don’t know if people north of the border understand the word ‘respect’ but it seems to have disappeared from the dictionary in England!

Speaking of which, has anyone noticed that Gordon Brown has never been to RAF Lyneham for the repatriation of any of the Afghanistan War dead?

While the rest of the nation bow their heads in respect, Gordon should be hanging his in shame!

Tuesday, 14 July 2009

Your Chickens Have Come Home To Roost, Boris.

Boris Johnson, Mayor of London receives a salary of £140,000 for carrying out his mayoral duties.

This pales into insignificance when you compare it to the Chief Executive of Kent County Council, Peter Gilroy’s salary of a pound short of £230,000 per annum, so the tax paying burghers of London are getting a good deal for their money.

Getting to the point, Mr Johnson writes a weekly column for the Daily Telegraph newspaper, for which they pay him £250,000 a year.

This is no second job scandal though, Boris claims that he is a fast writer and he dashes his column off on a Sunday morning. Fair enough, so it’s a lucrative hobby.

The scandal with this is, Mr Johnson dismisses this quarter of a million pound remuneration, rather cavalierly, as ‘chicken feed’.

For God’s sake, how many chickens can one man have?

When half of his electorate are on the bread line, shouldn’t he have chosen his words more carefully?

He does try to salve his conscience by saying “Of course, I make a substantial donation to charity”.

You and I know that donations to charity are offset against income tax, so in the real world this isn’t costing Boris a bean!

Good luck to him and long may he continue writing, but please Boris, try thinking before you speak next time!

Monday, 13 July 2009

Justice At Last?

Just when ex-Prime Minister Tony Blair thought it was safe to stick his head above the parapet!

It is reported today that there are fresh calls for a formal inquest to be held into the death of Government scientist Dr David Kelly.

If you remember, Dr Kelly's body was found six years ago in woods near his Oxfordshire home after he was exposed as the source of a BBC report on the grounds for going to war in Iraq.

Instead of a coroner's inquest, Tony Blair asked Lord Hutton to conduct an inquiry.

The results of that inquiry concluded that Dr Kelly died from blood loss as a result of cutting his wrist with a blunt gardening knife.

A group of campaigning doctors have now produced a report arguing that the Hutton Inquiry's finding of suicide was flawed and have handed it to lawyers preparing a legal challenge.

According to the team of 13 medical specialists, a cut to the ulnar artery was "highly unlikely" to have caused enough bleeding to kill Dr Kelly.
Post mortem reports should be provided to enable their questions to be answered, the doctors added.

One of the authors of the report, retired consultant in orthopaedic and trauma surgery David Halpin, said previous examinations into Dr Kelly's death were "flawed".

Lord Hutton was charged with inquiring into the circumstances surrounding the death and not the cause itself and his inquiry did not have the same legal standards as a coroner's inquest, he said.

"Due process has been subverted," he said. "The group that I am part of is not prepared to let that go. There is evidence of a cover-up."

He said: "He (Dr Kelly) was a very prominent germ and chemical warfare expert. That is relevant because of his knowledge of the biology of death. He had spent ten years at Porton Down (Defence Science and Technology Laboratory) and he knew everything about killing things.
So to take what was said to be a blunt knife and what was alleged to be his wife's co-proxamol tablets to try to kill himself is extraordinary. I think it's highly likely he was assassinated."

The report by the group of doctors setting out their rejection of the theory that Dr Kelly died of a haemorrhage will also be sent to Sir John Chilcot's forthcoming inquiry into the Iraq conflict.

Hopefully the Chilcot Inquiry will find that this was an unlawful war, ultimately leading to the indictment of Tony Blair and George W Bush as war criminals.

Ah well! I can dream, can’t I?

Saturday, 11 July 2009

Eight Deaths Too Far

Five more British soldiers have died in Afghanistan, with the deaths of three other soldiers in Helmand, this brings the total to eight killed over 24 hours, the Ministry of Defence has said.

Their deaths take the number of British troops killed in Afghanistan since 2001 to 184 and higher than the 179 killed in Iraq.

This number pales into insignificance compared to the battles of the Somme or Rourkes Drift but that’s not the point, this is a conflict that shouldn’t be taking place.

Do the governments of the troops engaged in Afghanistan honestly believe that it will make a ha’pence worth of difference to the fight against terrorism?

Do they think that the bulk of Taliban, Al Qaeda or any other group of terrorists are stuck in Afghanistan waiting to be wiped out?

Given Britain’s record on immigration, Osama Bin Laden is probably sitting in his council flat in Tottenham, laughing his socks off!

If the coalition killed every living thing there, do they think that this would end international terrorism?

Bombs will still be made in the back-rooms of Bradford, Bromley, Bridlington or wherever.

This is a war against a faceless enemy which, in all probability, will never be completely won.

So, Mr Obama, Mr Brown, in the unlikely event of you reading this, digest my words, cut your losses and bring all of the allied troops home today, and start looking at the enemy within!

Unless, of course, you are scared of the ghost of George W Bush!

Friday, 10 July 2009

The Prisoner Who Thought He Knew His Onions

A sex attacker who absconded during his trial in October 2007 at Kilkenny circuit centre in Ireland, and then later arrested in England, claimed he could not be extradited because he was allergic to onions and would die if he eats them in prison food.

Peter Ivan Dunne claimed that the danger of a reaction, especially to red onions, meant his human rights would be breached if he was sent to an Irish prison because it could not guarantee his meals were free from onions.

Red onions? Are Irish prison cooks that cheffy?

He told two judges at the High Court in London that his experience of Irish prison food proved there was 'a real risk, or near certainty' his dietary needs would be 'routinely ignored'.
This would violate his Article 2 'right to life' under the European Convention on Human Rights.

The judges rejected his appeal against last January's decision to allow the Irish High Court's extradition request.

If they had upheld his appeal, I can well imagine that before sentencing, all convicted prisoners would have to be offered a list of menus for their approval!

At least, I could never be extradited to France, I hate Mayonnaise!

Thursday, 9 July 2009

Unhappy Hour

Pubs and clubs in Loughborough, Leicestershire are being urged not to sell cut-price alcohol, as part of a police campaign to discourage bad behaviour.

Local police officer, Sergeant Andy Thornley said "irresponsible" promotions, in which spirits are sold for as little as £1, can cause young people to drink too much and misbehave.

The officer also warned that bars running irresponsible drinks promotion "could face action and penalties".

Sgt Thornley continued, "We are talking to the owners and managers of licensed venues in the town to encourage them to keep their drinks above £1.50."

"Irresponsible drinks promotions, which offer spirits for as little as £1, can encourage young people to drink too much too fast and that often, and can lead to problems later in the evening."

Then comes the moment when the officer discharges a bullet into his foot!

"Loughborough is a great place to spend a night out and enjoys a safe and vibrant night-time economy," he said, "but inevitably there are a minority of people who drink too much and behave badly."

If it’s only a ‘minority of people’, why doesn’t Sgt Thornley and his men get out there and round them up, the job he is paid to do by the good burghers of Loughborough, instead of punishing the majority of people who drink, but don’t behave badly.

What’s next on the agenda? A minority of vegetarians abuse children, let’s make ‘em eat meat, or a minority of Christians commit murder, convert them to Islam?

Why blame everybody else for ineffective policing and the break down of law and order? Surely they don’t expect to get paid for doing nothing, or do they!

Tuesday, 7 July 2009

Britain's Got No Morals

I can’t believe how deep Britain has got entangled with the death of pop singer, Michael Jackson.

OK, we all knew that this would affect his British fans but why has the British media seen fit to give it wall to wall coverage?

Now comes the final straw. We are sending a twelve year old boy from Swansea, Shaheen Jafargholi, a performer on ‘Britain’s Got Talent’, to sing at the Michael Jackson memorial service, to be held today in Los Angeles.

How short is the human memory, sending a twelve year old boy to glorify the life of an alleged paedophile.

For the sake of those of you with amnesia, back in 1993, Michael Jackson paid the Chandler family an out of court settlement of $22 million after allegedly sexually abusing their 11 year old son, Jordan.

I don’t know about you, but to me, if someone coughs up that amount of money, the word ‘allege’ suddenly morphs into ‘acknowledge’.

My thinking is, err on the side of caution and let the tribute go on Shaheen-less, or is Britain too morally bankrupt to care!

Monday, 6 July 2009

School For Scandal

Another case of educational madness, this time in West Sussex.

The parents of a 10 year old boy have called for an urgent review of spending by local authorities after learning that it will cost taxpayers more than £80,000 to send him to school in a taxi.

Daniel Foulds-Holt will have to go to Steyning Grammar School, West Sussex, by taxi, at a cost to the council tax payers of West Sussex of £80 a day for five years, because no buses run to it from his home in the remote hamlet of Edburton, near Henfield.

However, buses do run from outside his front door to his first choice of secondary school, Downlands in Hassocks.

Daniel lost out on Downlands because he lives 350 metres outside its recently amended five-mile catchment area.

This is not a case of parents bleating because one school is better than the other, his parents are happy for him to go to Steyning, what they aren’t happy with is the huge cost involved.

Daniel’s mother, Ros Foulds, a psychologist, said, "It makes no sense at all. It puts my son in a ridiculous position, it's a financial waste and it's environmentally damaging.
He would have preferred to have gone to Downlands but is happy to go to Steyning. It's just how he will get there that's the problem."

She added, "This is about the county council drawing up boundaries without any regard to transport. They would rather stick with their rules, even though they are ridiculous."

Mrs Foulds has submitted a request under the Freedom of Information Act to discover how much West Sussex is paying out in taxi fares in total.

Go on, have a guess! £1 million? £1.5 million. You’re not even warm.
The bill for 2008/9 was a staggering £5,588,500!

Although most is spent on children with special needs, £864,615 of last year's outlay was spent on children without such issues.

I don’t for one minute suppose that West Sussex is the only county council with this mentality. They probably use a program similar to a store chain’s internet site ‘store finder’ to work out who's going where.

When I punch my post code into the box on these sites I invariably get directed to their nearest store, three and a half miles away. That’s OK until you realise that the mighty Thames is in between me and the store, leading to a twenty mile drive, passing a couple of closer, local branches of the store en route!

What’s wrong with jiggling the school catchment boundary a tad in these kind of cases, after all, there are no straight lines in nature!

Saturday, 4 July 2009

Play The Game

Another example of the world, or the UK to be precise, going mad.

Parents were banned from attending an inter-school sports day at Sandy Upper School in Biggleswade, Bedfordshire last week, to protect pupils from kidnappers and paedophiles.

The kids aged seven and eight competed in the long jump, hurdles, sprint, 400 metres and relay races.

Their parents are, naturally, up in arms at not being able to support the youngsters.

Paul Blunt of the East Bedfordshire School Sports Partnership, which ran the event, said the "ultimate fear" was that a child could be abducted.

He said, “If we let parents into the school they would have been free to roam the grounds. All unsupervised adults must be kept away from children. An unsavoury character could have come in and we just can't put the children in the event or the students at the host school at risk like that.
The ultimate fear is that a child is hurt or abducted, and we must take all measures possible to prevent that.”

Nick Seaton, chairman of the Campaign for Real Education, said it was “totally unreasonable” to ban parents from a sports day.

“It's clearly a serious misjudgement. One of the great pleasures of sports day is that their parents can watch them take part.” he said. “If you followed the thinking of this ban you wouldn't be able to let you child out of the front door.”

Mr Seaton is absolutely correct, after all, do paedophiles and abductors roam in packs on the streets of Biggleswade?

I don’t think so!

It’s possible that more paedos died in Los Angeles on Thursday last week than inhabit this little market town with a population of 15,000 residents!

Friday, 3 July 2009

"Will you, Sandy, take Jules..."

I don’t mean this blog to sound like the rantings of a homophobe, gays, I can take them or leave them, but a story today has got my back up.

Chris Bryant, a former deputy leader of the Commons, now a junior Foreign Office minister has come up with the bright idea that homosexual "weddings" should be celebrated in churches.

When questioned by the magazine Time Out this week on whether he believed civil partnerships, introduced to England and Wales in 2005, should be scrapped in favour of same-sex marriage, Bryant replied, "I would like to see churches be much more open to the idea of gay relationships or partnerships being celebrated in church."

His suggestion goes directly against the rules of the Church of England and the Roman Catholic Church, which state that only the union of a man and a woman can be celebrated by a priest in church.

It turns out that we have been bamboozled for years. The Pope is not God’s representative on Earth, the Labour Party is!

Thursday, 2 July 2009

There's Now't As Queer As Politicians

For some reason, possibly vote catching, Tory leader, David Cameron has apologised on behalf of the Conservative Party for the legislation introduced by Margaret Thatcher banning the promotion of homosexuality.

Mr Cameron is referring to Section 28 of the Local Government Act 1988, which states:

"Prohibition on promoting homosexuality by teaching or by publishing material
(1) A local authority shall not—
(a) intentionally promote homosexuality or publish material with the intention of promoting homosexuality;
(b) promote the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended family relationship."

Speaking at a joint fundraising event for Gay Pride and the Conservatives, he said that Section 28 had been a “mistake” but that the party had moved on since its introduction in 1988.

“I’m sorry for Section 28.” he said. “We got it wrong. It was an emotional issue. In wanting to make the party representative of the country, I think we have made some real progress.”

What’s wrong with this legislation? Aren’t people capable of choosing their own sexual preference without it being rammed down their throat?

The only flaw in Paragraph (b) of the Act is, it should have continued with “and get on with teaching a decent standard of reading, writing and arithmetic”!

Wednesday, 1 July 2009

EU Sees Sense!

Good news for a change. From today, potatoes resembling naughty bits, cucumbers shaped like horseshoes and other misshapen vegetables and fruit will be freely available from a purveyor of greengrocery somewhere near you, after an absence of twenty years.

The European Commission (EC) has abolished its rules that discriminated against imperfect fresh produce.

From today, thirty six types of fruit and vegetables can now be sold whatever their shape, size, lack of sheen or gnarled skin.

The EC’s intention is to lower the price of fresh food and to cut red tape for growers and importers. Retailers estimate that prices for misshapen and blemished produce will be about 40 per cent lower.

The National Farmers Union said in a statement: “Farmers and growers work extremely hard to produce quality food but nature does not always comply with a perfectly rounded sprout and poker-straight carrot.
It is good to hear that people will be given the chance to buy odd-shaped fruit and veg and see they taste just as good. It will help eliminate waste, which has to be good news for consumers and British growers.”

This will certainly be good news to my neighbouring farmer, who has to ’plough in’ 50 per cent of his crops for the sole reason that they don’t meet with EC criteria!

Isn’t it funny how this depression has suddenly made people see sense!